American woman, stay away from me
American woman, mama let me be
Don’t come hangin’ around my door
I don’t wanna see your face no more*
Girls, the party’s over. Those Victoria’s Secret bras that hide your nipple erections just won’t cut it anymore. You need to get serious.
Here are some general shopping guidelines for you, straight out of the Koran, and courtesy of DesertStore:
1. Clothing for both women and men should be modest.
2. Clothing should not attract attention or be used to brag or show off their wealth or social status.
3. Clothing must cover the entire body; only the hands and face may remain visible.
4. Clothing must hang loose so that the shape of the body is not revealed.
5. The material must be thick enough so that no one can see through it.
6. The woman’s clothing must not resemble the man’s clothing, nor should the man’s clothing resemble the woman’s.
7. While praying in a mosque, clothing should be plain and not be distracting.
You can go ahead and substitute the “praying in a mosque” bit with “flying Southwest Airlines.” Just the other day in San Diego, the American carrier tried to kick a California hottie in a white miniskirt off a plane because of her outfit. No, really. (My guess is she’ll soon be a very rich hottie. Gawd bless America.)
I’m not surprised.
Along with a recent security obsession (“everybody is a potential terrorist”) the long standing US obsession about anything distantly resembling “lewd, obscene or patently offensive looks” (“to ensure the comfort of children and adults with heightened sensitivities”)
is ever so hypocritical.
If you’re a society that tries to mix selling 24/24 sex (look, it’s Paris Hilton!) with the sensitivities of a bible belt, someone will end up as fashion roadkill…